I must give credit to Ike Pigott (@ikepigott) for the idea of a "Top 10 People to Unfollow" list. Although I can easily think of several individuals I’d like to place on this list, I figured it would be too mean to actually call them out by name (and possibly result in a libel suit). So the list below contains ten archetypes that I’ve noticed on Twitter. I’m sure there are many others, so feel free to add your own in the comments section.
1) The Pimp - The pimp is always looking for avenues of self-promotion. If almost every tweet is a reference to a blog post and even conversations end in links to posts, you’re following The Pimp.
NeckRelaxr: New Blog Post: Neck Relaxer big online sale! http://tinyurl.com/xi8xs
NeckRelaxr: New Blog Post: Have you had your neck relaxed? http://tinyurl.com/xi8xs
NeckRelaxr: @trumommy You must be tired after putting your kids to bed. I’ll bet your neck could use some help: http://tinyurl.com/xi8xs
2) Ultra Extreme - These people are not bad, they’re just overachievers. If you lead a regular life, you might feel a little inadequate after reading their tweets. Unless you enjoy feeling like more of a lazy slob than you already are, lift that forefinger and click the Unfollow button.
IronMarathon: Finished three miles. Preparing for bike ride up Mt. Tam. Breakfast after that.
IronMarathon: @skyhigh Are you ready for our jump over Sonoma this weekend?
IronMarathon: Back from kite boarding. Heading out to the bungee platform.
3) T.M.I. Freak - This twit isn’t afraid to let it all hang out. Whether it’s a bodily function or a random thought about killing everyone in the office, there are no limits or filters here. Unfollow, or you may become an accessory.
jax: I wonder how many calories there are in a booger.
jax: Listening to Dr. Demento, "Dead Puppies aren’t much fun." Heh, heh.
4) Granola - Granola never met a cause he didn’t like. If a cause somehow pits Granola against "The Man" and the corporate elite, he is there. It’s best not to tweet about eating meat, driving a car, or most other normal activities when Granola is online.
grummer256: Heading over to the square right now. It may be a sit-in or a walk-out. Not sure yet.
grummer256: @student5 Dude, stop using blue ink. Black absorbs light & is more eco-efficient.
5) The Professor - The Professor is an intellectual who imparts his wisdom to his followers. He’s quick to guide you to the "correct" world view and is always willing to lend a sarcastic remark.
moreorless: Well color me red with your sanguine remarks. [chuckle]
moreorless: @ladyluck Of course your theory would be impossible to prove since that event occurred 25 years prior. 
6) Troll Stalker - What can I say about this one? There’s always at least one troublemaker in the bunch. The Troll sneers at your earnest tweets and belittles your achievements. Don’t bother arguing with a troll, they will always get the last word. If you cross a troll, he just may turn into a Stalker. The Stalker will follow you on Twitter and every other social media site known (or yet to be created).
7) Ideologue - The ideologue is not really on Twitter to discuss anything. His mind is already made up and he’ll show you how wrong you are with copious links to extreme blogs and YouTube "proof." The Ideologue is usually an extreme hater of one thing or another.
amerika: What a complete idiot. "Bush stumbles on White House steps": http://youtube.com/dkdkdk
amerika: @mekkey It’s the Republicans and their "Commander in Thief."
amerika: Filling up the VW from Bush’s Blood Pumps.
8) Sports Dude - Maybe you like sports, but which sport, and which team? Make sure you and Sports Dude are a perfect match or you will get way more play-by-play detail than you bargained for.
cubsfanatic: The ball just left his hand. #gocubs
cubsfanatic: It looks like it could be a slider. #gocubs
cubsfanatic: No swing on pitch number one. Get set for pitch two! #gocubs
9) Antisocial - Antisocial uses social media a lot, but that doesn’t mean he has to like it. He may be one of the top Twitter users, but he spends much of his time poking fun at other people’s use of social media.
kvetcher: Hey, here’s an idea, pick up the phone and call someone.
kvetcher: MySpace use is up 50% while library use is down 75%. #dumbasspeople
10) The Attendee - There are two things that this twit loves, Events and Hashtags.
lolgirl: Livetweeting the Social Sirens Conference. #socialsirensconf
lolgirl: Tony Seaver of "Be Your Best" is speaking. #socialsirensconf
lolgirl: You can be successful, but you must believe in yourself. #socialsirensconf
lolgirl: Never give up, but sometimes pause. [favorite!!!] #socialsirensconf
There you have my top-ten list of twits to unfollow. Did you see yourself in there? If so, it was completely unintentional. :) Can you guess which one I am? I’m not sure where I fit best, but I do know, "Dead Puppies" by Ogden Edsl really is a great song.
For those that follow me on Twitter, be sure to look for me now under the username, “Jesse” (or @Jesse in Twitter speak). If you’re already following me, the transition should have occurred seamlessly, and you shouldn’t have to re-follow me. If you have me in a TweetDeck Group or similar 3rd party app, you may want to update me there. I have created a new account under my old username, “JesseStay“, just in case anyone has anything pointing to that username still. It just sends people back to this account.
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